Landlords Right

After removing Courage Best Bitter the landlord was surprised at the results of the latest experiment. "I was proven right!" he exclaimed. "It took me a week to sell a nine and I had to use it in shandys at the end just to get rid of it".

Why was this such a surprise when the original survey indicated "No body drinks it".
If the bus is unreliable you make other arrangements, you don't keep popping back to see if they've improved.

Reality drinking

"A pint of shandy please."
"Lager or Bitter?"
"Bitter please."
"Which one?"
"Butcombe please."
"That'll be two pounds."
Well it doesn't get any more exciting than that does it. Who will be in through the door next, how many chairs can be put up before the final bell, who will eat someone else's supper? Don't miss tomorrow night's opening time to find out.

Bucklewell

Darts Team take to the Boats.

At Last! Frozen Keg Beer arrives at the 'Riverside'

At last what everyone 's been crying out for, frozen keg beer! The Riverside has got ahead of the game and brought in Kegs. For many years the Riverside has struggled to maintain and serve the finest quality products at the highest possible standards and now thanks to 'Keg and freezer' products they will be able to provide a product with consistent quality. This long awaited move away from individual tasting warm beers with local character will please the youngsters of today who have long been vociferous in their clamor for frozen beer.
Many people don't like the taste of Guinness but since they have been feezing it and the taste becomes irrelevent it has become quite trendy among the 'young' and Guinness are quite pleased too.
I personally can't wait until they fit the stainless steel tanks in the cellar and we can all enjoy what technology can really offer, like cans from the super market which seek to emulate draught beers by inserting trained farting beetles in the bottom.

So, is there going to be a 'Plastic Beer Festival' next year. I wonder what the bloke with the camera said when they asked him.

FOOTBALL TEAM

Despite the possible, and sometimes obvious, risk of heart attack a football team is being considered for the pub. Choice of colours for the strip, Red or Blue and all games will finish 5 minutes before the whistle blows.

SCIENTISTS LOOK AT POSSIBLE MEDICATION IN BEER

BREWERS could be asked to put 'medication' in beer on health grounds.
Scientists are considering whether brewers should do so to reduce the risk of alcohol-related brain damage among Britain's heaviest drinkers.
The idea for adding Thiamine as a preventative measure against a disease called Wernicke's encephalopathy has come from Australia.
Now the Scottish executive health department has asked an advisory group on alcohol-related brain damage to ascertain just how widespread the problem is.
Critics say adding Thiamine, or vitamin B1, to alcohol would undermine health messages about the need for sensible drinking and reinforce complaints about the 'nanny state'.
Alcoholics are at particular risk from Wernicke's encephalopathy, which can also result in a condition called Korsakoff's psychosis if it is not treated with an injection of thiamine, says The Guardian.
Thiamine is found in foods such as cereals, lean meats - especially pork, soybeans, dairy products, fruit and eggs. Bakers have to add it to bread to make up for its loss during manufacture.
A shortage can cause headaches, anorexia, tiredness, confusion and loss of balance.
Tablets are available as over-the-counter supplements.
Mark Hastings of the British Beer and Pub Association says Thiamine could change the taste and style of beers valued for their natural ingredients:
"This particular additive would be designed to help people who consume far too much alcohol. They are extreme alcoholics. They should be discouraged from drinking at all." AOL.com, 19/11/02

NEW Riverside Bar forum

Have your say, see what others say, have your say about what others say.
Say, it's that easy!

Mobile Phone but no friends?
Do you sit all night without getting a call
We will call you as many times a night as you require -

• We ring
• You answer
• We hang up
• You keep talking
• We charge

Remember to talk loudly.
(Tell your friend about our service, but not on the phone)
Guaranteed to annoy almost everyone http://www.nofriendsbutgotphone.com
sponsored by CAMP
Campain Against Mobile Phones

Steve's Arrival Stakes

Concern was expressed over the validity of last Saturdays result when Steve was seen comparing mobile phone information and discussing times with the wrinklies in wrinkly corner. 

Courage Best Bitter

(Also sold in pints.) A bloke with a camera said "...it was the best I tasted...". (It's sometimes difficult to tell!) During a recent experiment nobody did. The Courage Best impressed the camera bloke so much we decided to take it out.

Smiles all round!

Courage Best Bitter has been withdrawn. It seems no-one was drinking it, despite selling a 9 gallon barrel each week, and the easiest solution was to change the beer rather than encourage others to try it. Pity it wasn't included at the beer festival earlier this year rather than beers no-one can buy. Smiles it would seem, are willing to support a pub where NO-ONE drinks bitter. Pity to lose Courage Best after that nice man from CAMRA said all those nice things about it.

MP backs 'honest pint'.

MP, Valerie Davey, (lab.Bristol West)
has signed EDM 464 which states:
"That this house considers that when ordering a pint measure beer and cider drinkers should receive a full liquid pint without having to ask for a top up; notes research conducted by CAMRA which reveals that 80% of pints served in pubs are under measure, some by up to 15%; further notes that current legislation is insufficient to protect consumers from short measures and that attempts at self-regulation have comprehensively failed; believes that there is an urgent need for legislation to protect Britain's 15 million beer and cider drinkers from short measures; welcomes the Goverment's proposals announced in December 2000 to introduce more effective protection against short measures; and urges the goverment to ensure drinkers receive fair measures."

ALL NIGHT VIGIL

Due to the increase in break-ins at the Riverside Bar the management have had to employ drastic measures (Usually just below the line). Vigilanties have been seen on the premises at night.

Members of staff have had to remain onsite, sometimes into the small hours of the morning. Landlord, Leon Franklin, 25 of substantial girth, said, "We have to do this, none of us likes it and it can cause some upheaval at home. Some people will take anything. Infact most of my customers take liberties and all of them take the piss".

Join the Pub's foreign coin collectors club.

Each week you will receive a new coin cleverly concealed in your change. Current sets include Gibraltar and Dutch 5p lookalikes. Previous issues include 50p pieces from many countries especially Ireland and the Isle of Man and the locally produced £1 coin.